


the tumultuous place where i live

by ivyns



Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Other, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-10
Updated: 2018-06-10
Packaged: 2019-05-20 09:34:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14892099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivyns/pseuds/ivyns
Summary: A slow walk through Cene and AuDy knowing each other through to after the September Incident but before true endgame finale events.This is half repairs, about two fifths pining, and the rest is character study (????)





	the tumultuous place where i live

**Author's Note:**

  * For [awindingstair](https://archiveofourown.org/users/awindingstair/gifts).



> work title is from Mount Eerie's song "Through the Trees Pt. 2"  
> thank you very much to @BeeElderly on twitter for betaing this fic for me!!!!  
> this is for @ouroboroi on twitter as part of the FatT rarepair exchange!
> 
> hi it's me ell and i love AuDy

The first time Cene sees AuDy, they don't say much. It's clear that AuDy's done their research to pick someone who won't need to connect them to the mesh to do diagnostics, and Cene doesn't ask why they don't want to be. The mesh can be traced and AuDy wouldn’t have come to them if they wanted Automated Dynamics to know they needed to be repaired. They fix the damage to AuDy's chassis, and they don't push them to leave Automated Dynamics. They've done repairs to other robots who don't want to leave everything they've known just because they've gained sapience. It can be a slow process and Cene can be patient.

By the time AuDy does leave and find a ship and a crew and starts getting into dangerous situations, Cene has installed a shotgun into one of their arms and scrubbed the internal trackers Automated Dynamics had installed. AuDy talks to them more, now. They complain about their crew and give their opinions on what Cene's listening to on the radio. They give Cene a "Branch's Best Roboticist" mug for their birthday and start being able to pay cred for the repairs that Cene had been doing pro bono. Cene doesn’t tell them to get into a safer line of work but does occasionally complain about having to fish bullets out of their chassis.

They become what Cene would consider to be friends. It’s not what any of their professors would have called professional, but it's been years at this point and they know AuDy inside and out. AuDy who has a sense of humor despite what people might think, AuDy who helped rescue them when they were kidnapped, AuDy who removed one of their antennas as a gift and wears a new symbol around their neck, AuDy who is never more engaged than when they're talking about piloting.

Cene learns more about flying a spaceship from them than they ever did in their course on spacecraft modeling. They find out that AuDy can hold a thin wire between two fingers so gently that it doesn’t bend and shape several into a flower. They give AuDy a list of audiobooks to listen to while they’re waiting for the Chime to finish a mission or doing their own repairs to the Kingdom Come. 

Cene knows that they can't protect AuDy when they're doing whatever job The Chime's been hired to do, but they can patch them up when they come back and give them space to let their guard down and help them feel safe. They can give them time to say what they need to say and somewhere to go where the Chime isn't. They're fine with being a port in a storm.

And then AuDy says they're going off world and the only thing that Cene can give them is a bag of nanomachines, instructions, and hope. They want to give AuDy a hug before they head off, but instead they press a hand onto their shoulder and wish them good luck.

\--

They know that AuDy is going to be gone for a while. AuDy had said they would be travelling through dark space, and Cene’s made long trips between planets before. They throw themself into their work and try not to think about the work orders that AuDy isn't sending in or how things would be different if AuDy had just agreed to do let them do remote diagnostics.

It’s months later when they get a frantic and apologetic call from Aria who's halfway across the Golden Branch and saying something about AuDy being stuck or trapped or something and that they'd stayed behind on September. When they turn on the news, they just see the space where the planet September had once been.

They want to close up their workshop and lie in bed for a week, but there's still work to be done. There are dozens of robots who stopped suddenly and they need to figure out why. There are repairs to be made and commissioned works to finish and they don't think about the mug in their cabinet.

It's harder than they thought to push AuDy out of their mind. AuDy supposed to be just another client, and clients came and went. Still, they catch themself thinking about how AuDy is doing in the middle of repairs or doing a double take at every old Automated Dynamics model they see. They write emails that they can't send and tell their reminder app to postpone AuDy's yearly tuneup for another six months.

The only time they really get to talk about AuDy is to the Chime or, surprisingly enough, Candidate Ibex. The Chime has scattered to different places but sometimes Aria will drop by and get her arm tuned up and the two of them will chat over coffee. She’s the one who recommends Cene’s work to the Vanguard.  
With a lot of pushing, Cene ends up working on Ibex's robotic bodies and that gives them the opportunity they need to ask important questions.

Cene finally gets to over several long repair sessions. Ibex and Righteousness have known Liberty and Discovery for longer than Cene has known AuDy, but the answer to how long they've known each other varies between around twenty years and tens of thousands, depending on what kind of mood Ibex is in when he answers. Ibex covers the broad strokes of Liberty and Discovery's history (that they're divines, that they were created together, that they put themselves into AuDy's chassis for a reason). The mechanics of the gates are left unclear but he sketches a diagram that explains how AuDy and Rigour and the planet September are trapped. He confirms that locking Rigour between two gates is a stopgap measure at best but it's the only thing they have and maybe in another few hundred years, the Golden Branch will be ready to face the threat of Rigour head on.  
Cene tries not to think about how long a few hundred years is. That hundreds of years are a drop in the bucket compared to eighty thousand doesn't matter when AuDy's involved. AuDy whose body was only made twelve years ago, AuDy who they've seen change so much over that time, AuDy who has only ever lived on human scales of time. AuDy who is having to cope with being themself and two divines alone.

Cene is finishing up work on a servo in Ibex's hand when they ask "Do you miss them, too?"  
For a moment he's silent. Cene can tell that he's considering exactly how to phrase his response.  
"I do. That doesn't mean I'm staging a rescue mission, Dr. Sixheart." His voice is falsely reassuring. "They need to stay where they are to keep Rigour from destroying the Golden Branch."  
Cene clenches their jaw and takes out the broken servo. "I'm not asking you to. I know it'd be dangerous."  
"They know the sacrifice they're making."  
Cene wants to ask if he really believes that, but they don't. "That's not at all as reassuring as you think it is." They put a functioning servo in place and smooth Ibex's synthskin back over his hand. "There, you're done. I'll bill your office."

\--

Things change over the next four years. They get more work from the Righteous Vanguard and less work from individuals. Their Branch's Best Roboticist mug goes back into rotation. There's so little news from the void where September was that it's better to not think about it. Besides, there's always more work to do.

And then a blank work order comes in when they've been awake for twenty six straight hours, care of the Liberty and Discovery Automatocorp. Their breath catches in their throat. For a moment they think it's a prank or spam but the origin of the message is right for September and their head spins. AuDy. AuDy is alive and functioning and after five years of radio silence, a mostly blank email is enough to make them cry for a bit. It takes almost an hour before they’re calm enough to compose their own messages to people to see if anyone else has heard from them.

\--

On the day they see AuDy for the first time in 53 months, they don't even notice when they walk in. Cene's door is open for walk-ins and they're focused in on soldering a resistor in place in a circuit board. They don't even turn around when the door chimes. "I'll be with you in a moment, just take a seat."  
"I am here for my checkup. I sent you an incomplete work order."  
Cene, to their credit, doesn't drop the hot soldering iron on their work or themself. The time it takes them to put it back into its holder and unplug it from the wall gives them the chance they need to compose themself enough that they don't fall over themself getting over to them.  
They close the distance between them and wraps their arms around them. It is not comfortable. AuDy is a stack of unyielding metal cubes.  
"God, it's so good to see you,” Cene says.  
There’s a definite pause before AuDy pats their back but the pat itself doesn’t seem forced. It’s like they’re having to remind themself of how interacting with Cene works.

AuDy’s shoulder is starting to dig into Cene's chest and they back up a bit to get a better look at AuDy. Their security vest is gone but the symbol of the Iron Choir is still around their neck. One of their cameras’ lenses has been cracked and there's grit between their joints. They have a new arm and something else is different about them that they can't quite put their finger on.  
"Are you okay, Cene?"  
It's only then that they realize that there's tears in their eyes. They scrub at their face and nod. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. It's just really good to see you. Take a seat, please."

AuDy sits down on the same backless chair they did when they last saw Cene. Their joints creak, and there's a moment where one of their knees stick. Cene pulls up a rolly chair across from them and gives them a once over.  
"Give me the run down, AuDy."  
"I lost an arm. It has been replaced by Maryland September. No one has been able to clean my joints. A lens in my camera is cracked. The nanomachines you gave me stopped functioning after the first six months."

They know that AuDy rarely wants to talk about what they're thinking about. If they wanted to say something, they would have already. Cene doesn't press them on that, even though they can tell from the way that AuDy is holding themself that something's different and that they couldn't have spent 53 months trapped on September and come out completely the same. Surface questions only, then. At least until they can get AuDy to relax.

Cene nabs a brush from their workspace and holds out a hand for AuDy's. They give it to them. Their hand is cool in comparison to Cene's. They start to brush dirt and small rocks from between their fingers. "Have you been gardening?"  
"Yes."  
"What were you growing?"  
"Lettuce. Tomatoes. Bell peppers."  
Plants that people can eat, Cene notes."Were you staying with someone, AuDy?"  
"Yes."  
Their fans spin up some and Cene concentrates back on carefully fitting their brush between the gaps in AuDy's joints. They know that AuDy has the most touch sensors in their hands and they are gentle with them. Cene can't stop themself from giving their hand a light squeeze when they're done cleaning it. A less perceptive roboticist might have missed AuDy's light pressure in return but Cene's the best on Counterweight. They give a broad smile, even if AuDy's focus is elsewhere. Their cameras are split between the half finished projects around the workshop and Cene's hands as they work.

They get a small flathead screwdriver and use that to lever pebbles out of AuDy's knee joints. They can hear AuDy's fans start to spin down, and there's less resistance in their limbs. When they look up from their leg, AuDy's cameras are all focused on them, even the damaged one.  
"I need to replace that lens for you and then I'll check over everything else. Are you okay to be hooked up for a diagnostic?"  
"Yes."

They put their screwdriver to the side and start to a cabinet. "That's your eight centimeter lens, right?"  
"It is."  
Cene pulls on cotton gloves and rifles through a few bags before finding the correct one and bringing the new lens back over to AuDy.  
"Shut down your visuals for me?"  
The lights next to their cameras flicker for a moment before going out. Cene knows that AuDy doesn't like this. They like to know what's going on. They like to know what's happening to them.  
"Alright, I'm unscrewing it from the base of your camera." They do so slowly and sets the cracked lens aside. "Okay, that's out. I'm going to brush away some dust that got in through the crack and then I'm going to put the new lens in. Okay?"  
"Yes."  
Cene gently wipes away some dust with a microfibre cloth and then screws the new lens into place. "Alright, test that out for me?"  
Their camera lights turn back on and their cameras all focus in sync on Cene's face.  
"You have new wrinkles."  
Cene touches their own face, the edges of their eyes and their forehead. "Yeah, five years is a long time. A lot has happened since you--left." There’s a pause before they can redirect from AuDy towards their checklist for the appointment. “I’m going to grab the right cables and then come back and hook you up to the monitor so I can see what’s going on with your insides.”

When Cene comes back, AuDy’s picked up some loose bits of wire and started twisting them together. Cene lets them keep doing that while they plug in the cables to the right ports and start running a diagnostic sequence on their computer. They sit back while it runs and look at AuDy.  
"How does it feel to be back here? You know, off September and everything."  
"Lonely."  
Cene pauses for a second. They had been expecting something positive. Freeing or relieving or good or something like that. "Lonely?"  
"Liberty is gone."  
Their bluntness shouldn't take them by surprise after knowing them for so long but again, Cene has to take a moment to process. That was the difference in their movement. AuDy and Discovery without Liberty. They were more focused now and less eager to move. AuDy had always been, well, fidgety wasn't the right word exactly, but they had always moved their fingers in microscopic increments when they had to stay seated without flying something and they'd never much liked being tied to one place.  
"Oh AuDy."  
AuDy doesn’t respond and just keeps twisting the wires together until a chime echoes from Cene’s computer. “You should check the diagnostic, Cene.”

It takes some effort, but they tear their gaze away from AuDy and towards their computer where they click through to the final report.  
"Looks like you're in decent shape. I need to clean out your fans but other than that, you're doing well. Someone must have been taking care of you."  
"Maryland September."  
That was a name that rang a bell. Ibex had mentioned her and she had published several books that they had read in undergrad.  
"Did she replace your arm?"  
"Yes."  
"She did good work on it."  
AuDy starts to form petals out of the wire, looping them back to the center of the twist. Similarly, they circle back to Liberty’s departure instead of talking about Maryland. "They wanted to be free again. We were keeping them there. It was a prison."  
Cene sits back down across from them. They suppress their instinct to touch AuDy’s shoulder. AuDy will let them know if they want to be touched. Liberty leaving isn't something they can do anything about, but they can try to help AuDy and Discovery cope with the loss. They can support them.  
"We should talk about this, AuDy."  
There's a pause and they can tell that AuDy is processing and choosing their words carefully. A few of the lights on their chassis blink quickly and a secondary hum starts up. Their fingers stutter with their wirework.  
"I--we--Liberty and Discovery were created together eighty thousand years ago. Discovery has never been without them. They were not built to be apart."  
"Do you know why Liberty left?"  
"They wanted to be free again. We could have stayed on September for hundreds of years while we waited for the planet to fall into a star. We could have brought new people back to the garden once it was safe. They needed to leave."  
"Do you miss them?"  
"Yes." Their fingers twitch inwards around the unfinished flower.  
Cene's heart aches. They want to fill that space for AuDy and Discovery and if everything's going to end because of Liberty, then the least they can do is make sure that the people that they left behind are okay. They take a moment to really study AuDy, not as a roboticist but as a friend. AuDy’s hands aren’t quite closed completely and their cameras are entirely focused on their own hands. They look lost.  
Cene lets out a slow breath. "Let me clean out your fans, alright?"  
AuDy nods and Cene moves to their back to pop open their chassis.

\--

It's slow. AuDy has people to warn and Cene still has other clients to serve. But they insist on seeing AuDy every week when they're on Counterweight. Cene asks about Mako and Cass and Aria and AuDy asks about the projects that Cene's been working on on the side. Cene gives them their check up and AuDy makes tea ("Maryland taught me. She said I never got it right." Cene chokes down a mouthful of oversteeped green tea and forces a smile. "You're doing fine, AuDy."). Cene makes sure they always have something new to tell Discovery, either about a bug in their programming or a fact they learned while listening to an audiobook. The blue lights on AuDy's chassis pulse when Cene's told them something particularly interesting and their voice modulates some as their voice box tries to interpret two inputs as the same voice. Sometimes they end up watching videos together until Cene falls asleep on the couch and they always wake up hours later, disoriented but with a blanket draped over them. Cene tries not to hope too much. It's likely unethical to have a crush on one of your clients but they're also friends. Most of their conversations don't have to do with maintenance. They want AuDy to be safe and secure and above all else _happy_. But they know that AuDy doesn't like to be touched without warning and that they and Discovery have work to do and that the world's end is on the horizon. They don't bring it up and they don't bring it up and then 

"Aria asked if we were dating."  
To their credit, Cene's hands pause only for a moment as they brush out AuDy's chassis. Their heart pounds in their chest and they try to keep their voice steady. "What did you say?"  
"I said I would have to ask you."  
That at least explained the series of increasingly large winky faces that had been accumulating in their messages from Aria.  
"Do you want to be dating?"  
It's AuDy's turn now to pause. The only sounds are Cene's heart beating in their ears and the light brush of a microfiber cloth against metal and AuDy's fans.  
"Yes."

Cene closes up their chassis and carefully puts in all the screws and then moves around to AuDy's front. They hold out their hands to them.  
"AuDy."  
"Cene."  
They put their hands over Cene's.  
"Saying I very much want you to be my partner is an understatement."  
AuDy leans their head forward until it barely touches Cene's and Cene presses back to get more contact.  
"Is this okay?"  
"Yes."  
"Is us being partners okay?"  
" _Yes_." Their voice glitches for a few words and they reset and try again. They press their fingers into the palms of Cene's hands, firmly enough that Cene can feel pressure but not so much that it hurts. "My partner."  
"My partner."


End file.
